Dear g-n Beavers! I understand, that my question concerns to psiholo more...

[Julia]

Dear g-n Beavers! I understand, that my question concerns to psychology more, but in that conference now there are absolutely casual people who have simply nothing to do or make. Therefore I write here. I rent the apartment together with 2 more girls (one-room). One of them constantly provokes conflicts - carps on trifles at me. I have not erased that from a table, how my friend speaks, " not under that angle socks have put " still or even any bosh to carry begins. And for other girl she "does not notice" it or this. First I smoothed the conflict and suffered or bore. Then became her otvachat and finally to quarrel. After quarrels she, as a rule, began conversation the first and spoke, that is not right and will try to be terpimee. Some time she really happens normal, and if something is necessary to her addresses - friendly. But in general often happens " not in spirit ". Even at job other girl (they together work) ask, in what Natasha today mood. And so, through any time she again finds any trifle to carp. I wish to tell or say at once, that I the person peaceful and hardly experience conflicts. From its part I do or make all that I can to save good relations - we with the friend we take my neigbours at cinema, on concerts, exhibitions, my friend brings products from the market, etc. In general I cannot understand its or her motives, in fact spoiling and framing an intolerable atmosphere she cuts attitudes or relations suk on which sits. In this city at it or her absolutely anybody is not present, the salary at it or her small, on all spares, and kavrtiru can remove or take out only potamu that two more (can therefore and it is reconciled then with me) pay. I simply do not know, how to me of messages - to become similar to her and to stick with a nose into its or her own errors - here see, you have not washed utensils, you again today have not born or have not taken out dust? But it means war! To suffer or bear all it and to settle? How much it is possible! To speak about it or this with her it is useless. Other girl it sees all and understands, but does not wish anything to speak her, t. To. They together work also she is afraid of revenge. I in raterjannosti.

[Bobrov A.E.]

Similar, that your neigbour sees in you some threat of the authority. Can be unconsciously is jealous (and it or she has a guy?) . Considering you should to let to her know it, that you do not apply for its or her superiority or championship in those spheres which for it or her are especially important. But would be nepoho if also you have incured the responsibility for something. For example, she - for cleanliness, you - for cooking. The second, it is important to spend a certain border (and to let to her know where she passes or takes place) further which you do not suffer its or her attacks. It is necessary to show, that you to live in a status and without it or her and then she should pay for an apartment more. And you should not show the last, that are afraid of the conflict. Show, that for you can postojat. And more it would be certainly very good, if you could approach in any image with her. To talk otvrovenno on the important subjects. Sometimes such rapproachement occurs or happens after the conflict. Therefore even after quarrel talk to it or her, let she will open and will state, that it or her in you irritates.