Judge please and give advice or councils. A situation in the following: I live in citizens...

[Sara]

Judge please and give advice or councils. A situation in the following: I live in a civil marriage 2, 5 years. 1, 5 of them we have lived on a demountable apartment, last year with parents of the husband. You longly were necessary to get used to that that not the mistress. The husband too 1 one year ago had 1 room apartment. And the whole year we could not start to do or make there repair iz-for financial problems. Have borrowed or occupied money. Its or his mum has there and then come running and has told or said that is necessary for her 400 $ for its or her any affairs (she the fan or amateur of mains-operated marketing... To put kuda-that and to not receive money, how much time she already got on some thousand dollars... But it is other history) it would be not a pity if money have gone or send on business... But it is similar they and have got lost gde-that, there and then podsuetilsja its or his brother (which lives off parents and accordingly at us) has taken money for repair of the machine or car. We have taken this money under concrete business, under % %%. . And that me has simply deduced or removed the last from itself, it when the husband has told or said that he has put last money to mum there on any bill for a while she asked... And more... It was necessary to help or assist koe-what to make in a repaired apartment and he has asked the brother to help or assist... .i the brother worked for it or him for money... .eshche there is a sister... Which has asked to make to her repair in bathing while she will have a rest with the husband, and my husband is going to to throw our repair and to work for them. The resume of all that have been written such... There is no rest, it would be desirable to live separately and that its or his relatives did not interfere with our business or affairs... But I cannot understand as me to react to all these requests... While I speak nothing, but forces are not present to suffer or bear...

[Nika]

Take the husband, and in what is an apartment!!! At us as was in due time. Ate on a box from under whose that of the TV. From mebeli-only krovatka for dochi. But And ONE! And with all now good relations, and repair it is done or made more quickly when there you live. Success.

[Birch]

It is necessary to talk to the husband and to explain that constant leakage of money in occasion of and without an occasion from family never that will allow this family of that to reach or achieve. You all over again would learn or find out its or his opinion on this question.

[To ??a-birch]

It is necessary to speak certainly, only the family becomes faster semyoj, when SEPARATELY! Not depending on anybody.

[Lena]

And how business with your relatives is? You it or him
Help or Assist? Or in your life "take part or participate"
Only Its or His relatives? Voobshche-that to help or assist
To parents are normally. Probably, in family of yours
The husband it is accepted in a greater measure, than in yours, and communication or connection
Your husband with its or his family it is very strong. In yours
The message the jealousy and sobstvennichestvo is felt. You
Want, that the husband did or made all only for you and yours with
It or Him at home, and he thinks also of the parents.-
To mine, it is normal, an another matter, that in this case
Its or His help causes financial injury or damage of yours with it or him
To family. Talk peacefully to the husband, and ask,
As he is going to to repay, if all of money has given
To mum?

[Leka]

No, it is not normal. At the husband now family,
Before which at it or him the obligation in the FIRST
Turn, and then mama-brat-the sister. He can
You as the wife does not consider or count, therefore to him is closer
Parent family? Simply "civil marriage",
Forgive or Excuse me, but this or thus beautiful words for
Banal cohabitation (do not take offence, itself so
Vein 1, 5 years). While so a vein (on the by the way
To obstinacy), the husband for the high-grade husband not
Considered or Counted. And so, type we live while together (it or him it
oche-e-e-n offended), and first of all
Cared about roditeljah-to the sister, instead of about itself. Can
And at you the same?

[Lerchik]

Similar in family of yours of the man have got used to that on-a milk cow, and that irritates you, for them is possible. I on your place would think, whether to connect or bind the life with this person, consider, that that occurs or happens now, will proceed for life. Think, sustain? At my girlfriend the husband contains the grandmother (babushka-this or thus sacred, the elderly person), and also two brothers. Their parents have died, and it is very a pity to him of the mladshenkih bratikov (two huge foreheads 28 and 21 year). He buys it or him machines or cars, a computer, is simple so gives money (and in fact not the rich person, the apartment even is not present), the wife all suffers or bears it or him only iz-for children. How much time they swore in this occasion, nothing varies. For the beginning try to talk to the husband, suddenly he will understand, what it or him simply use and will change politics concerning native?

[Lija]

Lena and why the brother and mum to not help or assist young family bystrenko to move to the apartment? The feeling of a measure in all should be simple. I too can tell history. One familiar woman whom already for 50, rises at daybreak and home comes back to 10 evenings, she needs to earn money, at it or her 2 children (the student and the schoolboy) and an one-room apartment. To her there comes the younger sister from other city, lives on its or her money on a floor of year, walks across Moscow and waits while the sister will come and she will feed all a supper, but in fact the mistress. This woman speaks me I understand, what is it is not correct, but I cannot expel the sister.
I too advise you to reconsider the attitudes or relations with the young man. To correct the person not probably.

[Birch]

If young women consider or count all, what the family first of all, and parents - in the second whence then such mums then undertake?

[Natalia]

Instead of it is weak most to earn, employ workers, to make repair. And to not force the husband to be broken off or be lacerated between mum and you.

[Katya]

Nightmare! To me friends did or made repair free of charge! And can become pregnant to you then he will see the responsibility for FAMILY, instead of for the girlfriend?

[Belief]

Think above that has told or said Leka. Once observed pair at job. She about it or him for eyes: " About, my civil HUSBAND, such vzaimoponimnie, such love... " He about her for eyes: " Not, I three times was already married, more - will suffice ". And these people lived together, and they had, by the way, a general or common child. Here so.

[tusja]

It seems to me, business not in that, a civil marriage or official. My lawful husband addressed in due time with me much less carefully, choj my liked with which we live together. We, by the way, do not name each other the husband or the wife civil (well only he stipulates sometimes and me the wife names) at other people, and my liked, my liked. Because it passes a short of our attitudes or relations. Me simply very much surprises, why your husband knows nothing about your experiences. Talk to it or him! Only it is quiet, without scandals. How it is possible reshchit a problem, it or her not discussing? Only do not speak: you do or make all for make related, you making related has bothered and tp. And simply tell or say, that it is unpleasant to you, that you cannot separately live, complete repair, that you nekomfortno feel. And why you do not make a decision on where will go money, and all only a post factum learn or find out? Make the minimal repair and move, the rest on the sly will complete.

[Sara]

1. My parents live in other city. Work all... Both mum and the daddy and the brother... For pennies. I too help or assist them as far as possible, within limits certainly. Last time when were at them on a visit has given mum of money, but she has refused, we has told or said, that to us they it is now more necessary. 2. Can in any and to a measure is chustvo sobstvenichestva (but in fact it we plough on 6 - 7 days in a week while others at all naprjagajutsja. We receive almost equally, sometimes I even more), but I reasonable and raelnyj the person. .i at all against what he would help or assist mum. But a problem that he is valid as a milk cow. Its or his brother at parents in favorites (if so it it is possible to be expressed) parents have told or said to him that he can not work, but anybody from them does not provide it or him. He eats at our expense, wears clothes which I buy for the husband, etc. and if something to be necessary everyone run to the husband and ask money from it or him. He though and to be angry, but cannot give up.

[Lija]

Natalia, and you probably stack the husband in postelku and give him to a papilla?
He the adult the man, he cannot even repair an apartment how he will bring up children? All life to take money under percent or interests and to give mum with the brother that they did not cry, and the wife will give percent or interests. Mum of money asked on something necessary, and the brother in general without comments.

[lerchik-aON]

Katya why you have solved, what beremennost-the decision of a problem? On the contrary, the problem only will be aggravated, with that only a difference, that now the man tears off agents from the woman and so will also take away from the child. It turns out, what own family always will be is on the second plan, unless you such will wish the child? By the way, it is very glad, that at you such good friends.

[Katya]

It agree, nonsense has told or said. But if it is fair, I do not know how to make so, that the man would define or determine for myself priorities. First the family, and then making related. It agree, someone will tell or say, that mum, the daddy, the brother is your family for ever, BUT! The Jobless brother to him will not give birth to children, in bed snim will not lay down, and for certain will not console a difficult minute!!!
And in general I hardly understand, how it is parents HAVE allowed TO NOT WORK!!! He the student? The Patient? Defective? When we with the husband studied in University, parents helped or assisted us, and from the third course on job have gone or send, and anything, all were in time! I am afraid to speak it, but is similar, he does not perceive you as family, as the WIFE! I least wish you to offend or doubt of your feelings, but...

[Natalia Lii]

Yes, I very much look after the husband, it is one of ways to express him love. At the same time I consider or count, that each of spouses has the right to have own opinion in occasion of charges. Present, at both of us on the adult child from first marriages. And gle we would be, if began to be considered, how much a coma of gifts is made. And it is a question of such things as apartments and t. I do or make item And repairs itself, in sense I finance, I define or determine amounts of works, I employ brigades. In fact it is household questions, means female.

[Sara for Natalia]

As I have already told or said, that I work (and I study) and myself I provide. For the husband still copeck has not asked. Forgive or excuse, and if I also shall solve questions with repair and t. The item for what then is necessary to me the man (Pay attention! I speak that not only for this purpose. What then will enter into its or his duties? If I work, institute, houses all I do or make itself, what he will do or make?

[Natalia]

It seems to me correct if the man in a life does or makes that you ask. "Rulit" a life vse-taki the woman should. And he can have a deliberative vote. You distribute or allocate job on every day between house on forces and opportunities.

[lerchik-?aOa???]

If at Sary in a life the husband would do or make that she will ask there would be no also a problem for now the husband does or makes about what ask mum, the brother, the sister... I have listed all?

[Lija]

Little girls, and my-that it is thought as to live, where money to earn. And Natalia also works for us, yes so, that apartments to relatives gives, and the husband looks after, both children brings up, and repairs does or makes itself. When all is in time. A fairy tale, instead of the woman.

[Natalia Lii]

If the conductor of an orchestra has tried to play a concert alone and on all instruments, well it would turn out? So be the conductor and carry out simple function - mashite a rod.

[Natalia Lerchiku]

Probably, it is necessary to learn to ask correctly.

[Lerchik]

Here see, Sara, you, it appears ask incorrectly and to conduct be not able:)