I wait for the child, in three weeks it is necessary to leave in the decree. The child not zaplanir...

[Tanja]

I wait for the child, in three weeks it is necessary to leave in the decree. The child not planned, but desired. And still me pavors, first of all, iz-excruciate that I lose job. I have worked here year, it is the first job which - is pleasant to the present, and my salary makes exactly half of family budget. Been solved or having dared on the child, we with the husband understood, that we lose half of income, having a duty or debt under the credit and expecting addition of one more little man. But then it seemed, that all problems are solved. And the more close the decree, the is more at me than sleepless nights. Girlfriends speak, that the husband can earn on us, or, at least, try to earn more. But I have got used to be in all peer to the husband (including financial), and to me hardly to understand, that I shall hang at it or him on a neck. To me starts to seem, that I shall become in its or his eyes the useless, uninteresting person. And more oppresses that I cannot return on this job (the heads, certainly, speaks, that year will wait for me, but I know, that will not take) back. The husband speaks, that I shall find still the best job, that now the most important to think of the kid. I mind or wit understand all, but sometimes I wake up at night and to a roar, I can do or make nothing with myself... Excuse for a long monologue. Very much it would be desirable to hear kind advice or council in this situation.

[Kiseleva E.J.]

Hello, Tanja! Your throwings are very clear, for now a modern society to aspire to erase borders materinsva as those and the independent woman. More and more than women, arriving to marriage or spoilage, wish to carry otvetstvenenost for family on ravne with the man. And from here there are neurotic situations when it is necessary to be broken off or become torn half-and-half, on the one hand, career and fin. Independence, on the other hand, natural aspiration to become or begin and be mum. A choice to make difficultly, as well as in one, and in other party or side. However, even on the most complex or difficult situation it is necessary and it is possible to look or see positively. It concerns or touches also you... The nature gives you perediyshku that you have reconsidered the outlooks on life or have found more to itself a suitable role. As... The pavor of loss of job is very great among women who wait for the child, but also in it or this our difference from men. Kto-someone earns, someone gives birth or travails, brings up and earns thus. You should choose the way most suitable for. If you of it is very good zarekomedovali at job whence at you doubt, that will simply ask you when you will sit with the kid. If such doubts are, talk to the chief. You thus lose nothing. As I am am surrounded with young mums who at once came to work, literally in two weeks after sorts or labors. The child thus did not suffer. Always series bubuli and deduli. At many even husbands, reduced the operating schedule that also the kid to be engaged and the wife to support or maintain during the complex or difficult period for it or her. As, that in your situation is a lot of outputs or exits, simply you should stop to complain about destiny, and widely open eyes to look or see at those opportunities which surround you. There are no impasses and furthermore unsoluble, there is only deadlock view on them. Success to you both in a birth of the kid and in your career.

[___]

Tanja, for the pregnant woman norm or rate something are afraid and to cry often. And in occasion of your phobia lose job I can to tell or say one: if you live in the big city, and furthermore in Moscow other job will find without problems. Here it is so much vacancies, only have time to run on interviews. I from cleanly sports interest recently have tried to find the second job (I gl. The bookkeeper with the free schedule) - and so has found for couple of days, and with the salary from 400 $ for 2 days in a week. But to work has not gone. So it is not necessary to be afraid, positive emotions are now necessary to you. Really, all problems are solved! You will not live off the husband, you will be rastit YOUR kid, and it is serious work for which "salary" receive happy edentulous smiles of your child. Do not experience, at all of you it will be good.