As at you here briskly! Share, please, opinion, to that not laziness (as the husband...

[Anandi]

As at you here briskly! Share, please, opinion, to that not laziness (both men, and women).
To me almost 30. In marriage kak-that essentially would not be desirable. Tried to be many times "family" without shtampika - satnovilos awfully boringly and I have run or all kak-that by itself stopped, that did not cause or cause special experiences.
Except for that there was one problem - I could not have children. Terribly experienced in this occasion, felt pustyshkoj, a doll rubber. Thought, the muzhik who to me of the baby will conceive, on arms or hand I shall wear.
And here, so it has turned out, that there was a sex with not so close friend. Well has happened and has happened. Mutually it would not be desirable continuation. Have concerned to it or this as to misunderstanding, posmejalis and have continued friendly dialogue. BUT... I have become pregnant. Here so years you try to conceive with the liked person and anything, and here once - and please.
And all anything, I was awfully happy, sijala, casual daddy, yet vysnilos, that at me actually two at a birth colourfully thanked. Here that also has pulled down me. One, without a registration, without the medical policy, without parents - women will understand - a two rastit not simply difficultly, and is unreal. I do not speak that the first months even bread to buy or purchase there will be nobody, and visits to any social securities behind grants or manuals, and purchase of things, carriages, pampers - in advance it or this to do or make it is impossible (a bad sign), moreover necessary to consider, that all in the double size.
Money a separate problem. Thanks God, job at me is and to the decree on her have concerned easy. Even have enabled any time to work at home on a computer. But all the same my salary will not suffice. In fact also the apartment should be removed or taken out, and in Peter you know the prices. In a room hardly someone will start up me with two children - abnormal not so much as it seems. Most of all I was caused anxiety with a question of the social status of my twins. In fact without a registration neither in sadik, nor in school, grants or manuals additional dzhat it is not necessary. All means, for a payment, for money - me it is so much to not earn all!
And here I sit the third month and I think - as it would be desirable to be noble as it would not be desirable to be the stinker. When I have informed daddy detok on pregnancy, he has fairly offered in marriage and I am proud have refused. Not only from promptings nobleness - it is simple both of us fine we understand, that family from us any, well to not get on to us together - what for a life each other to fracture. Besides I am not less proud have declared, what is it my children and my problems and from it or him nothing is necessary to me - I yet did not know, that their two.
Now we meet daddy seldom, once a month. Cheerfully and easy. I about what do not ask also I demand nothing. He is lost or confused (still) and does not know as itself a message. Except for that quite explainable man's pavor - whether and mine it in general children (that the condom has forgotten to dress as that disappears razom). I try to not put before it or him rigid ramok and demands, I do not force event, I do not demand attention to myself and cares of children. But... Same not dolls and not cats. This all too serezno. Periodically I reflect that if with me something happens during sorts or labors or after - whether he will care of them or my kids will give to children's home. If I shall marry another - whether will leap in couple of years in itself fatherly feelings and whether at me one more problem their daddy will explain to children who exactly. Now its or his help, its or his support, its or his care is necessary to me. And I am afraid, that sooner or later I should raise the question rigidly: Or he in white and on a horse and in case of need will help or assist and will support or maintain (even if it will be very difficult and will demand on couple of months to forget about a careless youth) or he classical "villain" from a serial and I to be deceived I shall not begin simply in hope to the aid in case of fors-a major. Once again I shall repeat - to marry to myself the person, to demand from it or him money, registrations and other I am not going to, but the confidence that will help or assist if that is necessary to me... Or will not help or assist if that.
Now I try to not press on it or him. But the fact is the fact is its or his children. He can forget about them, not think of them, not see them, from it or this they will not cease to be its or his children. For me all is easier - I feel them and I like, I sing it or him songs and I indulge vkusnostjami, they for me are real. And for it or him it only misunderstanding, structure or frame of cells, lumps. I understand it and I allow him time to make a decision whom to be. But the more close term of a birth, the more rigidly a question. So whom to me vse-taki to be - a noble silly woman or the clever stinker?

[Leka]

To be a silly woman - employment or occupation absolutely not noble and not grateful. Let papashka helps or assists, a situation at you practically desperate. One hardly will pull especially at the double...

[IRISHA]

It is necessary to talk to this person and precisely to formulate that you vse-taki from it or him want... Marriages, simply help or still that. Time he offered a marriage probably the person quite good and will execute all demands. Fun and ease in this case seems to me unproductive.

[Madam Hrjundel]

It seems to me. That you very adult and independent woman, for me the choice would not stand... And and here in general bitchiness? You should take care of yourselves and children, the mistake or error was the general or common, he, fortunately, has appeared not last the swine, so where here strevoznost-that? You consider or count yourselves noble? Give also to another the right to decency! Success to you!

[] or atjushka]

You cannot be neither a noble silly woman, nor the clever stinker. You can be only a usual silly woman! A flag to you in arms or hand and pride on shoulders! Have refused the HELP from the father detej-the SILLY WOMAN! Thus complain, that you not spraivtes. And here not h % I, forgive or excuse, then zhalovatsja-so it is proud have solved! Give, it is proud and silly operate or work in all and dalshe-and forward in a circle of vagabonds and in mothers without children! So also it will be necessary to you! Proud it is necessary TO be able TO be! And you of it or this not pnimaete, because you the SILLY WOMAN! Before you were the FULL SILLY WOMAN, that in marriage a principle did not leave, and now you became IN GENERAL the ROUND SILLY WOMAN with a stomach or belly! Why you do not entitle the father TOO to make the choice? Only YOUR children and only YOUR problems??? Then you had not the right to speak him that zaberemenneli from it or him! So not h % I to cry and nyt here. Itself it is guilty! Your ARROGANCE (and at all pride) will ruin you! And so also it will be necessary to you! Children only here it is a pity.. . You have lived till 30 years, and and have not learned to distinguish concept "duty or debt" "nobleness" "pride" and "arrogance"... Well, probably, now learn... It is not surprising, that at you there is no registration even in Peter... Probably from village any have arrived, therefore and the SILLY WOMAN such... Only in glubinkah the same SILLY WOMEN so can argue, as you! And that not all!

[Yana]

] or atjushka, one I can not understand - really so it is necessary to offend???? What for?? Mucks and so suffices... .otkuda it??
Anandi, it is very explanatory or sensible Madam Hrjundel has told or said.
At me even the feeling is, that you will be happy together.)))

[Olga]

Ogo-go! I already have not shed a few tears nearly! I by the way, now too on the seventh month. Also it is very glad, to read, when kiddies like! For example I was afraid taki to read through in okontsovke, that you wish to make abortion. (do not give that the God!) All will be excellent or different. I do not know as in Peter, can there so business or affairs with a registration, (I from Ukraine, at us in general a registration have cancelled) but in Kharkov here I zhivu-even without registration, and earlier (yet have not cancelled) and without a registration are bad. I do not see any problems. We - to mine live in a civilized society!? All sots. To you the enterprise, and then posobie-mothers to the single is obliged to pay payments, to two at a birth state like more less should pay. At me at the brother of the husband, two at a birth. Two devchushechki. Mum on them receives decent enough grants or manuals. On them, and on itself still! And what they charm! This miracle! I after them also have dared to become pregnant that! Before as of that think were gde-that in the far future. And the father of the child, it is possible and to ask frankly as he concerns to the detkam, and then, any muzhik if it to make with mind or wit, it is possible to lead think of what exactly of it or this he and wanted! Also what to help or assist he wants, instead of you! In marriage, if families at you it do not turn out, to leave it is not necessary. But it is possible to take material pomoshch-on njanku, and most on job to leave before! And if you will marry another, well and chtozh? Why children should have a complex from = what they illegitimate children? Let know! Who their daddy why so has left. Anything here stydnogo is not present. And then, if you will leave zamuzh-it will be not tomorrow, and not in a year? Esi in 2 years, they that can remember and will not be, that one grew (though photos, all the same memoirs, etc.), through three will precisely know. And if net-all the same early or pozdo learn or find out. All secret becomes obvious. What for to hide? They only then rasstrojatsja, will experience. And here this bred-that with you something happens, in general dismiss!!!! From what stati-that? With any something can happens! So? To All to not give birth or not travail, marries?
At my mum the friend byla-in 16 years was ill with a cancer of a blood. Was afraid sobachku to get or start, as that remains one!? Has married (parents of the husband were against), have taken from a shelter the girl, have adopted. The daughter now such as I - 23 years, the husband was lost five years ago, and here this the friend has died of an insult! (I ask to notice!) a floor of year back. Having left the daughter with ysshim education, with a three-room apartment, both with the half-house, and on its or her job has had time to arrange still! As it is possible to be afraid of that if to hang up an axe, the child then will be born, will go to a cellar... And. t. d. Both t. Item And poslednee-my girlfriend mother has told or said to her kogda-that: " If we with the daddy would wait for money, you with the sister never would be!)

[The anonym]

The presents should live!

[] or atjushka]

Necessarily accept the help from the father of children. You can e remain friends, but live together is better... He will help or assist, especially he wants. To refuse it or this it is really silly!

[The anonym]

To be the clever, NOBLE woman!

[Anandi]

Oh Thanks all for responses. Both for kind and for malicious. Katjusha a full charge, well I, certainly, have shot in obshchem-that not in insult. For such vypleskov there should be reasons, wish you, Katjusha that at All of you it was adjusted. Purely or cleanly for the information or inquiry - I from Moscow, (not from children's home - parents have died), in Peter live 12 years and never set as to myself the purpose to receive here a registration at any cost though marry to myself for the sake of it or this could not time. This question has risen only in connection with children - I badly imagine problems with which they can collide or face iz-for it or this. Probably, I myself wind as well as all pregnant women. And that the SILLY WOMAN yes to admit, I sharply grew stupid or became silly. Always considered or counted itself clever, independent and self-sufficient. Here first time in such situation when it is found out, what is it not so.
Still it seems to me, that I should koe-what explain. Actually, I have refused a marriage not knowing about two at a birth. One I would extend without problems. And to live with the unloved person in enough ekstrimalnoj the situations, caused to two grudnichkami, - to break couple of years of a life both to him and. Now, knowing that to what, I can already be and have not refused. But the moment that is missed. And to put the young man to a wall Marry also all here I cannot. And what is it will be for family the Question there was iz-that for it or him it not pleasure, not happiness. To him 23 friends, cinema, clubs. And here it is necessary to refuse and begin from all it or this assiduously to earn money. Well about pavors of men before children's we cry also dirty diapers I naslyshana. As a matter of fact, he is not obliged to do or make anything. To leave pregnancy or not both should accept the decision. I have accepted it or him independently. The responsibility on me means and is correct - a silly woman. I, certainly, shall not refuse the help. Yes only moment-that it is missed! The offer was only one, the second probably and will be, and is possible or probable, as is not present. I need to know precisely distribution of my forces by last month. It turns out, that anyhow, it is necessary to undertake any actions concerning the father. A variant with to make so that he thought, that it or this is wanted by HIM, instead of I to me to tell the truth, impose. Here also it would be desirable to hear opinion of men in this occasion. Both in general, and it is concrete, and in particular.. .eshche time of thanks all for support. To tell the truth, from all these questions at me the roof goes. But it too can be written off or copied on something:-)

[___]

Katjushka, you a round SILLY WOMAN. That have thrown on Anandi? Correctly she does or makes All. To marry on zaletu - any bydljachaja a habit. From it or this anybody becomes happier not. Anandi, simply enable papashke to participate in a life of children, they should know the father! He, similar, not against you to help or assist. And accept this help, do not bring down all on the shoulders and do not speak, what is it only your children. They and papiny too. You very reasonable person, have not done nonsenses in a temper, WELL DONE I wish happiness to you with all my heart.

[Semyonych]

From a man's audience: for me it is that situation of which I last years think First of all,
Beginning or Starting elementary acquaintance to the girl. Can,
I suspect a step or two forward, it will seem to someone silly, but I can not differently. And already having thought, I build the further attitudes or relations. Or I stop them not reaching up to bed. And now about the main thing. Try to keep as much as possible together. And why have solved that the family is impossible? Try vse-to create family.
I believe, the man your coeval? Well it is age of the responsibility. Simply be more time together. As consequence or investigation - will be from it or him the help.

[Anandi]

___ - He not against to help or assist, but also does not burn with the desire. Most likely, if I about something shall ask - he will not give up. But in fact it needs TO be ASKED... Or to demand?:-) in that continually, what not pleasure we to the person, and a burden, a problem, a headache.... Semyonych - to him 23, me 29. It at me age of the responsibility, and at it or him session:-) Thanks for expressed opinion.

[___]

Anandi to demand, as I have understood, not in your character, and it is correct. Simply agree with it or him, that even first time he will give you ennuju the sum. I think, when, he will see personally kids, a two, the, he prifigeet with happiness! It now they for it or him - abstraction, he does not wear them under heart. I think, he will be glad to help or assist. And to ask it is not necessary.

[] or atjushka for ___]

I did not speak n aschet a marriage! In the given situation it is better to her to not marry! And that she such proud without osovany also refuses for not clear reasons the help, and thus shouts " I one I shall not cope to two " is not reasonably, and she has understood it!

[Nikuradze Vladimir]

JA-the passive gay. Though externally at me it's OK: I am married, at me the child. Married only because it did not wish to be allocated from crowd, to be as all. Externally at me too it's OK: I am not similar to those pretentious idiots who have got used to see. The wife I do not like, and I think, that she feels it. Has hardly forced itself to lay down with her in bed, and not from the first at us with her it has turned out. Though she and the beautiful woman, she at all does not involve me and does not raise or excite. Mind or wit I understand, what is it abnormally. But anything with myself I can not do or make. But I have a fixed idea: I wish to become the normal muzhik, tzavoditsja from beautiful women, instead of from the geev-friends. Lovely girls, prompt, what to me to do or make? In fact in one perfect day this all will open and then....

[musja]

Cinema, friends, kluby-kogda-that it is necessary to refuse. And not to you to solve for it or him when him it to do or make. - to mine he for itself something has solved, and you iz-for upertosti the do not wish to talk to it or him. Yes think you of children, and that at you a reasoning while from the selfish point of view. The family can at you will zagljadenie! I in marriage left the husband did not like, and not by calculation of money to it or him was not, and different we were both on education, and on character, and on temperament, in general plus and a minus. Has left for it or him because all girlfriends were married and I was frightened, that I shall remain one. We live 10 years. There is a daughter. I adore the husband. To me with it or him it is comfortable, he extinguishes my irrepressible temperament the endurance or quotation, bears or takes out my foolish character. Very decent or considerable, clever, quiet though too happens not without it or this. And who could assume, I first of all would not believe. So do not hurry up to sentence the it is far not taken place family! I wish you and your children of success!

[Natasha With.]

You are afraid to be a burden? And at the same time it is assured, that itself you can not contain the children. Then define or determine - whether so strongly you want these children. It is impossible to live nothing endowing. Always it is necessary to choose.

[Alain]

Anandi, you probably have understood, that children from the God are given to you, give birth or travail and do not think at all of what. And with the biological father it is necessary to try to create family, can and it will turn out! It is not necessary to doom deliberately children on bezottsovshchinu. Do not incur one such load, let and he participates, can to him and it is pleasant. You will always be in time rastatsja.

[Peach]

It seems to me, that you the difference in the age of with your young man and for you confuses the main thing, to prove, that you not pataetes to force it or him to marry. You hammer on it, At my girlfriend the husband for 6 years is more younger, she too without a registration and other parameters of a safe life. So she was afraid of 8 years, kakby that have not thought, as a result gave birth or travailled enough late and poimela to a heap of problems, and in vain the fellow has appeared the perfect husband, and the rest were only its or her complexes. In 23 years the man can make correct and noble decisions, and you the attempts to take the responsibility on yourselves provoke it or him to cowardly acts, it is not necessary to do or make of the man of the rascal, to him with it or this to live. The registration is necessary to you for the period of pregnancy, in Peter without a registration to you will not get or start a map of pregnant women, and accordingly to be surveyed and give birth or be surveyed and travail it is necessary platno. The child without a registration do not deprive with educational institutions and health services, it is m. in a place of residing. And with these cheap grants or manuals in general an ambush, I and could not issue reception of a birth grant on the name as it is registered with the child in different places and I have different surnames. Be still ready to negative perception of the status of single mother and its or her children, beginning or starting from administrative organs, finishing or stopping public opinion. So, try to avoid this position even temporarily. There are periods in a life when us to not do without the help, consider or count, that at you such period has come or stepped, and if the guy is ready to help or assist you it is impossible to refuse its or his offer defending the ambitions. How much or As far as I have understood, you are an orphan and raschityvat to you any more on whom. Do not prevent to act to people how they should act.

[It is given]

Peach - well you and the stinker. Alain, and you - a silly woman, not you are pregnant two at a birth, and we would look or see that as though you at the God hoped. ANANDI, You simply clear head the woman, me such. Natasha of the right, in your position I would advise abortion. Reconcile to it or this is better than to cripple a life and and budujushchim to children. By your letter, you simply charm the woman, is clever, goods, and is womanly. I am simply assured or confident that you will act or arrive correctly. At you still all in peredi, not looking at that that to you 30. Success of the darling

[Natasha With.]

By the way, I at all did not hint on abortion. It certainly one of variants and you, Anandi, can choose it or him. But I so have understood, that for you to become pregnant - a problem. - I in this case can brake the pride. Is for the sake of what. Other chance it can not be presented. And the woman who wants the child, but cannot this desire to realize, will not be happy even with fantastic prince. Besides Anandi, nobody forces you to entreat the father of the child, especially not all life. If you have a head on brachiums, you and itself will grow up the children. The help will be necessary to you only the first 2 3 years.

[It is given]

Natasha, well and 2 3 years help or assist her these or it. And on the bill of a problem to become pregnant that if has once become pregnant, in the further problems will not be, here uvidesh. Even if you will not become pregnant, it all the same better than to doom yourself on such full of cares and problemm (magko speaking) a life. It not your chance Anandi, is a trap, do not get in it or her, the life is full of them. Your chance still in peredi!

[Natasha With.]

It is given, your point of view cleanly man's. Women concern to a question of posterity not so easily, as men. And, by the way, it is valid can its or her unique chance.
Anandi, read through all advice or councils, and act or arrive how itself you will solve. Everyone trepetsja, proceeding from the personal experience. But at all circumstance different.