Hello! Estimate or appreciate my situation: I live in a civil marriage hardly more go...

[Umka]

Hello! Estimate or appreciate my situation: I live in a civil marriage hardly more year. Very well, but mine grazhd. The husband became very much nesderzhennym in the words and sometimes tries to strike me! How to be?

[Kat]

I have left... And it is not simply cunning, and would run away.
Hardly more year is, - to mine, not term, for
That to learn or find out the person, but also not term, that
For ever to it or him;them to become attached... I consider or count what to live
Near to the violent and unpredictable person
Simply terribly.

[Umka]

I am am visited or attended often with such ideas, but recently I have learned or have found out, that we will have a child and it nonpluss me.

[Kat]

Yes, the child - serious argument and the important fact.
It seems to me, that there is nothing easier and more reasonably, than
To find out attitudes or relations, even easier or simply to learn or find out opinion
Other party or side in occasion of questions exciting you.
Ask directly, than its or his aggression, as is caused or called
He concerns to it or this. I would hurry and in
This case because be exposed to risk not
Only you, but already and your child.

[Umka]

We repeatedly talked on these subjects and constantly guilty there is I: that I not so have told or said, not so a sweater have washed, not to that have called... The constant control of all my steps! Has limited dialogue with my parents, relatives, and with girlfriends and has at all forbidden to communicate! For it or him priorities: I at home - wait for it or him, and he wants in sport-club, wants with friends in a bath... And I am tired from constant dialogue with its or his relatives!

[Kat]

Forgive or Excuse, Umka if I judge or shall narrow too categorically,
But you it is simple in zadnitse... If you arranges
Role " stepfordskoj wives ", such obedient
kiborga-dishwashers it is necessary to live a life
With it or this the man.

[Umka]

Thanks you Kat for sincere advice or councils! I am am stopped with my interesting position! On the one hand I consider or count, that the child should have a full family, but on the other hand I simply would like to throw everything, to leave to parents and to bring up the child independently! I do not know as correctly?

[Kat]

I married second time. And from the first husband has left
With the three-year child. However, parents helped or assisted.
The first husband has appeared the bore and the egoist,
Covered great ideas of service to native land. In
Such beggarly and humiliating conditions I to live not
Could, and as soon as the suitable occasion was found out
(The husband walked to the right and on the left on eyes at all
Institute where taught and teaches on this
Day) has simply exposed it or him from the house. Though
Liked!!! And more longly it was then excruciated, but has come to
To conclusion, that except for love in the man tsenny
The valid attitude or relation to the woman, care,
Nobleness... I can not tell or say, that my the second
The husband is ideal, but he adequately perceives mine
To the critic or criticism also it is ready to vary and be arranged under
Me because likes. And I try not
To abuse its or his love and infinitely I appreciate all
The best, that in itself is.

[The anonym]

If term allows is better get rid of the child and from the husband! Then he all so will not simply try to strike you, and will strike! Probably already pregnant, potmou that your "pregnant" behaviour and whims will irritate it or him. Probably you hold on pregnancy and to the extremity or end of term dare to leave nevertheless from it or him, already with the child on a neck. And if is not present, he too will start to beat the child, kogd atot podrastet. Here to you and rasklad your situation on some mesjatsev-years forward. Solve.

[Kat]

Dear somebody! Partly you are right, but I
Has told or said, that women leave from husbands with the child
Not " on a neck ", and " on arms or hand "...
Umka, do not hurry up to make similar decisions
Concerning the child, especially, if at you is
Parents!

[The anonym]

Umka, here is how time concerning the child it is necessary TO HURRY to make a decision, for the present something can be changed! Only to be defined or determined it will be necessary finally without dependence from that you decide it or him to leave or not.

[Kat]

I advised to not hurry up to get rid (My God,
What disgusting word!) from the child, as
There are the parents, capable to help or assist! - to mine,
The child - the best stimulus to adjust a life,
The responsibility for a small essence awakes such
The latent reserves of an organism. To me are known a little
Women, which having remained in loneliness with
Small kiddies have received one and even two
The maximum or supreme educations, were arranged on good job,
Could find worthy partners in life and very much
Are happy. Also there is a girlfriend, two times
Got divorced, it is indispensable with abortion or two,
Poor from the inaction, pity with pity to itself
Unfortunate and thrown by all from unwillingness and
Inabilities to like even samoju itself, instead of that that there
Children or the relatives.

[Marina]

You - that that want? You like it or him or not? Wish to live with it or him or not? Want the child or not? Can one (the inferior variant) it or him to grow up? Consider or examine;survey situations separately.

[Olga]

Leave for the sake of the CHILD. Such daddy and will beat and excruciate the kid. And, ksati, the husband has ungirdled not after has learned or has found out about your pregnancy?

[Martini]

And you it is casual not that Umka which in konfe " Young parents " communicates?

[Marina]

Umka and before becoming pregnant, you did not notice, what he nezderzhannyj?

[Umka pseudo UMKE]

Dear, instead of you nik could think up any other? And that people are confused - come on young roditelej-this nik for a long time it is borrowed or occupied. If you do not have not enough originality be called though 1, whether that.

[Umka]

Good morning! Thanks all for advice or councils, for empathy! Certainly I and earlier noticed, what he violent! But I all wrote off or copied that he gets tired at job (how much there was intense enough situation)! I soft enough, patient, sociable person! But to any patience the extremity or end comes! I simply want that with me respected, accepted such what I am and is simple on chelovecheski reckoned with my opinion! Eventually, I not the robot and not east woman who except for "yes" does not know other words!

[Pseudo Umka]

My name is Julia! My new nik-Julia!

[Kat]

That's it, you the woman, instead of the robot! Believe in itself
Also aspire to the best, on one man light
Wedge has not converged. Like and respect in the first
Turn of, and these feelings will be passed the rests
From you.

[Julia]

Certainly at me in soul or douche razdraj! Very much I am afraid to make this step! How much I blagovernyj has so lowered my self-rating, that I became as badgered zverek (my mum and the aunt considers or counts)! And he considers or counts, what not one normal the man (in it or him in comprehension the man with a prosperity) lives with me cannot, that I melkodushnaja and too materialized! Though I live and I buy products on the money and I ask them from it or him only when me does not suffice on our residing (he the person far not poor)! Superfluous I to myself do not buy Naturally anything, have forgotten when last time bought to myself things! Here such business or affairs.

[Iriska]

Silly woman! RUN!!! If he and before such was, in due course only will be worse, and normal muzhiks from coils fly, and if preconditions are, anything will not keep it or him! Also it is not necessary to be covered with words, that the father (especially if he does not provide) is necessary to the child, the normal family where nobody will beat it or him is necessary to the Child and constantly to humiliate. There is also a second variant. It is possible to show character, to prove to him, that you not a cloth, and the high-grade person! And it is not necessary to get rid of the child, he in what it is not guilty, I too know many who left with the thoracal baby, or on the eighth month, and now very well. I put the end - if you do not show ALL HARDNESS!!!! He will not change. Success!!!

[Julia]

In occasion of the child I for a long time have solved all! There will be we together or not, I shall give birth and I shall bring up it or him! On holidays I shall finally consider all and after, most likely, I shall collect things and I shall leave to parents!

[Kat]

Your decision, Julia, is worthy respect! Only
Be cautious, do not provoke its or his and not
Give in on provocation. Take care and
The future child! Success to you and all most
The best!

[Donna Roza]

Julia! You think in a correct direction.
To save the child or not, it only YOUR decision.
But this should talk to the man so:
I to you like but SO to live I can not any more and I do not want. Such attitudes or relations in family are unacceptable for me. Therefore I leave, if you will want me to find and talk about an opportunity of ours dlnejshego dialogue (as the husband, the friend, otsa my future rebnka or in any other quality), I shall be ready to support or maintain this conversation.
AFTER THAT collect things and leave in any case. All possible or probable conversations conduct not earlier, than through nedelku after leaving or care (very much I advise to sustain this term) before speak, that it is yet ready to conversation.
If you will not leave, he will not change, all only will worsen, amuse itself illusions.
If you will make how I advise, all can be adjusted, but also it not 100 %.
Also have in view of, what even having left with it or him for ever now if you will give birth from it or him to the child, you and the child all the same all life with it or him will be connected.
He at any moment can recollect, that it or he has a child. In fatherly feelings itself can be stirred up. In the jealousy itself can flash. A harmfulness. Desire otomsit. Desire to salt or do a bad turn. Can flash and positive emotions.
And the obsessional desire to communicate with the child when for example, you will marry, to the child will be years 5, he (she) will be eazyvat the daddy of another the man, and here will appear native daddies, will start to insist on the rights, to torment you...
In general, many through it passed or took place, is simple if will give birth, do not forget and be always ready, that all will be not so simply as it seems now.

PS. I from such husband have left for certain.