My question concerns or touches the budget of family, and, maybe, not absolutely to the address of. I vz...

[Alena]

My question concerns or touches the budget of family, and, maybe, not absolutely to the address of. I the adult person, consist in a civil marriage 7 years, to the son 17. The matter is that my husband does not consider necessary to support me neither on expenses for a life, nor on education of the son. I do not require, I earn itself, but the attitude or relation to the husband spoils year from a year.
Constrains only bed as it is difficult to begin any modern history. How to affect or influence a situation? The concrete example - on the offer partially to participate in purchase of a new suit to the child (less than thirds of cost) have been received the answer - I now am not ready. During a life with me - and we live 7 years - has replaced 2 machines or cars, otremotiroval the house in suburb, has constructed garage. I only dream of repair, as most to not pull. Silly, probably, to write about it or this, simply I do not know how to be.

[Elena]

And you would like for it or him in marriage? While you live in a civil marriage - you from it or him will wait nothing. He is not obliged to contain you but if you get married officially this problem will be solved differently.

[***]

Yes anything from shtapma in the passport does not depend! I lived in a civil marriage of 6 years and my friend gave me the salary and all overtime up to kopeechki. It seems to me, it is necessary to discuss from the very beginning the attitude or relation to the budget in family (if it is family, instead of is simple cohabitation for the sake of bed) who distributes or allocates money and on what they go. At you, Alina, unfortunately, kommunalka, instead of marriage or spoilage. Everyone for itself. I would look for something brand new on your place and would not repeat former mistakes or errors, at once discussing with the future husband as as.

[Jury]

To him it is convenient, how much or as far as it is convenient to you. A question only time. If till now the problem has not passed critical mass, the situation in a status of stagnation means. As early as a year, the son grows repair you will pull, and by the way what for he I about the husband is necessary to you. So some stability, can be reached or achieved and and without it or him.

[T-Rex]

And can will try or taste apperkotom (in sense to strike on a stomach or belly) - restriction to him in harch-to a ration or soldering, giving reason for that that money send away or have left on a life, the kinder, etc. More shortly to block there where its or his interests with yours are crossed

[Iriha]

You have written, that do not require financially, here your civil husband and uses it or this. To you it is good together, most likely he likes you but why he should spend money for your son? Can at it or him and the children are. He adheres to such position, and nobody can force to support or maintain it or him you financially while he will not want. So do not press on it or him, you do not wish it or him to lose, not looking on what.

[Elena]

Alain, has read through your report and it became direct not on itself as coincides much. The truth I with the live only the third year, but to the child too 17, too all problems I solve itself. Also arises mysl-and it to me is necessary, such husband, by the way officially he to me not the husband, we with it or him live in different apartments and we meet only on days off. But me already under 40, probably I like it or him, to search for someone or for someone else simply there is no either forces, or a desire. And he here such...

[Katya]

I at all do not understand, why you consider or count, what he is obliged you (and the more so your child) to contain? I too meet the man 3.5 years, at me doch-the schoolgirl but if I do not take from the friend to money - that only in a duty or debt (gives trouble-free and any sum). Thus at us remarkable attitudes or relations but while we not the family in the standard sense of a word, and in a head does not come to ask me without feedback, and he does not offer. Yes, gives gifts to me and to a daughter, brings sweet to tea - but money separately. And it is correct - I am not going to to be soderzhankoj but if we shall get married then the budget will be the general or common, but all up to copeck of money I shall not demand too. So your claims Alena and Elena I consider or count unreasonable. Similar. That the basic criterion of a choice of the partner at you - money, admit to itself it or this

[Elena]

The answer to Katya. Anybody and is obliged by nobody, but if people are going to and further to be together if the man has such opportunity why and is not present. Simply strange poluchaetsja-the woman betsja, solves the problems and the child, we shall notice sticks at job. And the man simply comes on a visit. Very convenient position at the man. And if at it or him money would not be, then is clear.

[Nona]

Elene: tak chto zhe terpite takogo muzhika? Sami sebe protivorechite:)) Uzh prostite.

[Igor]

Hammer the husband! All does or makes on a case of divorce, and he is close also spirit of it or this you feel sami-: ((((((((

[The anonym]

Elena that's it - problemy-that yours and your child, instead of yours the man. Simply at you not family, and at all I do not know as to name. And he fairly considers or counts, that friendship friendship and money separately. Simply you consider or count, that he is obliged to help or assist you, and he so does not consider or count. If you do not live together, and simply meet, your claims are absolutely not clear

[Raisa.]

All your problems of that you have right at the beginning put yourselves incorrectly (it provided that you together live) He has simply found to yourself the free-of-charge servant with bed in addition. And you 7 years it allow him, and by that spoil the attitude or relation to the child, and also spoil its or his representation about home life. You first of all should think of the child, instead of about the man. And not in the family budget here there should be a speech, and about SELF-ESTEEM!!! At you the adult son, to him it is fast during an independent life to go, and what the attitude or relation at it or him to the woman will be, you have thought of it or this?
My mum lived with my stepfather of 11 years, it is good, what when he at us has appeared, to me there were 15 years, and here to my brother was only 7, and I had to take away it or him from family, and 2 years to show on an example of the attitudes or relations with the husband and on an example of the friends, what the woman too the person, instead of the application to kitchen or cuisine (all 2 years he lived at me, in 3000 km from mother) and who will borrow or occupy in re-education of your child?

[Alena]

I feel a full silly woman, and the main thing, already I want nothing, in marriage, neither money, nor respect, anything. It is a pity, that we, the women, capable to earn both on the machine or car, and on washing, we are not able to demand respect for. Mine grazhansky the husband lived 7 years in my apartment, and was cried about that, about this. Features, me 42 years, am engaged in a sports hall, sjunulja-the schoolboy has already acted or arrived on! The budget! In high school, but lichnogo-composure is not present. Vospinanie sovdepovskoj an epoch did not allow to arrange scandals and so forth.. Probably, the person (man) at mature age does not change the habits.
And, really, as someone has written, it is terrible to remain one in 42.

[Raisa]

.. .uzh it is better than one, than here so..... Expose it or him for a door and it will be easier... .moja mum has made it in 49 and at last has understood, that did not live all this time, and toiled, and now to live the beginnings... .derzajte!!!