Hello! The situation has developed such. My parents (already pension vozr...

[Zayka]

Hello!
The situation has developed such. My parents (already a pension age) get divorced. As the initiator the father has acted. Speaks, that has grown fond of other woman. For mother this news was, to put it mildly, the uttermost unexpectedness. Have together lived about 40 years. Differently, certainly, happened. And similar was about 5 years ago, but has passed or has taken place quickly. Result of last "divergence" became their uttermost reconciliation and my break of attitudes or relations with the father (I was then "peregovorshchikom" with it or him and uveshchevatelem under the request of mother). In their this dissonance I vstrevat do not want. But I can not see suffering of mother. And she true exhausts herself. Mother though works, but the whole evening all its or her thoughts only about the developed situation. That speaks, that likes the father, all will forgive or excuse to him starts to water with its or his mud. Most hardly to her to be with it or him under one roof and to not talk. And she periodically tries to stick to it or him;them with heart-felt conversations. So proceeds more than three months. I tried to advise she to be switched to something. To borrow or occupy though in grandsons. Sometimes she does or makes it, but is the extremely rare, t. To. All time zatsiklena on the to mountain. Constantly reproaches me, that I do not understand it or her, when I advise her to keep and to not become limp. She and last time has lost health iz-for the experiences. And now I in general am afraid, that will be even worse. She to listen to me does not want or wish, I for not authority, wave away from any my words (actually, all life so was - attitudes or relations uneasy at us till now).
Please, prompt, that it is possible to advise the woman in such situation. Whether the internal help of the psychotherapist is necessary in such situation? And, if it is necessary, as to her about it or this to tell or say to not offend? In advance thanks for any advice or council.

[Kiseleva E.J.]

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[Oksana]

I had precisely same situation. Parents the truth of a prepension age, 53 years, and more the sister younger, 21 year. To me was then 29. But otnoshennija at me with mum excellent or different, she trusts me completely and to opinion of the sister too listens. We its or her all family, having connected to it or this pumped out the grandmother (its or her mother) and the aunt, the sister of mum. This process has borrowed or occupied about a year. The most difficult were first three months. My mum the person mainly emotional. First spoke, that does not wish to live, howled belugoj. We with the sister at times did not know what to do or make. It was necessary rigidly vtolkovyvat, that at it or her the family has not ended on the father, that to her is for whom to live, even oobvinjali it or her in egoism, but it only in lechebnnyh the purposes, on it or her it operated or worked, as it is impossible, otrezvljajushche. We have given her only a minimum. postojannnye conversations about essential, logic constructions and arrangements to change to the given situation the attitude or relation. Your mum itself should consult, and with it or this she will be helped or assisted by time. All depends on the person. If the person is weak or does not wish to struggle and survive, he will be not not helped or assisted by anybody. It is unique that you can, it to render her all encouragement.