Hello! Tell or say, how it is possible to adjust attitudes or relations with relatives of the husband?...

[Ina]

Hello! Tell or say, how it is possible to adjust attitudes or relations with relatives of the husband? At me to them awful hostility up to that only of them also I think, naturally, they cause in me continuous negatv, then this all pours out in depression; - ((all over again like all developed normally, but after rozhdenja mine dochurki... Neither the mother-in-law, nor the sister-in-law did not come to the child, the husband persuaded me and we EVERYONE vkend went to them, since fortnight age malyshki. Now at my baby rasporki on legs or pinches, and we anywhere ezdiim, even rozhdenja shall not celebrate day, yet we shall not remove or we shall not take off - and we shall remove or shall take off them in 2 months. Also what you think? The Mother-in-law and the sister-in-law till now have not come to see us, and at all have not called to learn or find out, how we here as mine the crumb consults... This inattention awfully oppresses me, I try to not think - but it is impossible... I Start to think, that only in vain decay to myself zhzn - oni-that rpekrasno live, and niochem do not experience. BUT how with it or this to struggle? How to struggle with this hostility, how to get rid constant ideas on them? It already turns in navjazchvuju idea, really... Thanks all in advance.

[Martini]

What for to struggle? They you do not touch or tamper with also you them do not touch or tamper with. And all. As do not recollect them, as they about you. They are necessary to you? Interestingly, and what your husband speaks in this occasion?

[_]

Ina,
Talk to the husband, but without insults or discussion of persons, explain that it is necessary for you to learn or find out its or his attitudes or relations to it or this. State the facts as you see them, and ask it or him to explain to you as yourself to a message. Explain, that you moves desire to understand.
At the same time stop trips having referred that you do not wish to impose yourselves to those to that you, most likely, in any degree while are indifferent. nekotorj the break in obshenii will go only on advantage or benefit. If the husband chochet to go itself - let goes.

And the most important care of that yours internal family attitudes or relations developed in the best way. Explain to the husband, that your family is your family, without any infringement of related or congenerous attitudes or relations. In fact in bed, excuse, you lay down without relatives, and to the child rise among night without them. RELATIVES it is wonderful, but kogdja you will construct house " the latch of happiness " I assure you, your relatives will not keep itself waiting longly with visits. Well and if is not present - well, love cannot be ordered. Also it is not necessary a negative and depressions - at you semnja, children and the liked husband - do not try to construct the latch of happiness for all at once, begin with the main thing! Most likely you do not go to church, as also your relatives (not by way of insult, but it is visible it is the fact). Esteem the Bible, the New testament, and go with the husband and a daughter to church. Will invite then your relatives. Often after assemblies in churches podstvenniki go lanchevat in blizhjshy restorn, where dialogue in a neutral territory to what not objazyvaet. But not stol-to neutral terriotorija the situation, how much changes that Christians not bertsja with relatives or problems with them - they live the most important - the God and family, not losing respect and the Christian attitude or relation and to relatives, and in general to associates.
I assure, you will open in the God for yourselves, the family and the life such, that will help or assist you to consult and with the experiences, and will help or assist to feel yourself first of all as family, and family which is under Dominical blagoslovleniem!

To in total you of the best!

[The anonym]

Aha, do not forget to direct to sect

[The anonym]

Earlier worshipped to Komsomol idols, now all gods, but sinned and then and it is now identical.

[Olesya Martini]

At me the same problem, as at Iny. Your advice or councils horoshy from the point of view of psychology of the woman, but not men... Ina writes, that its or her husband persuaded to them to go. Husbands very much often put pressure upon the wives if those do not wish to communicate with parents of the husband. To me yesterday the husband has fairly spoiled mood that I for 3 months and have not invited its or his mum to walk with our daughter. He periodically demands it or this, blackmailing me the attitude or relation to me... And I simply cannot call to its or his mum because when I with her talk, at me reduces a jaw, I start to stammer and I feel a silly woman. And all this negative iz-what when I have given birth, she never pozvanila personally to me and has not asked as I, how malyshka? And on a visit to us she has never come, though then lived in 20 ti minutes hotby. And now - the child does not know them, and I do not trust...

[The anonym]

Really it so is important: pozvonila-has not called, lichno-not personally. I so even at all do not remember, who called, who came or congratulated, when the kid was born. The husband was engaged in it or this: responded to calls, accepted visitors, and I have been so absorbed by the child, care of it or him, that at all did not remember, who called, who came. But to show and speak about the child to me it would be desirable constantly and it is absolutely indifferent to that and with whom.

[Ina for Martini]

And the husband very easy concerns to all event - constantly screens the, tpa they have, type it or him it is bad, money is not present on road - and in the same spirit... By the way, the grandmother our very believing, it is constant in church - anyway, chatso there goes, but it seems, feelings from it or this at it or her has not changed... The greatest problem that I realize, that a problem not in them, and in me, probably. Here in fact people live, and do not pay attention to such "trifles", and they taaaaaaaaak offend me, that become obsession... A question in how me to struggle with the negative, irrespective of THEIR behaviour?

[Helen]

Ina, and who such to you the mother-in-law? Today - the relative, tomorrow - anybody. Same not mum. She the person extraneous to you, what for on it or her to take offence. It is insulting for the child, but present, that at the husband mum far lives. You strong, will consult without them.

[Inessa for Elena]

Thanks, is above what to think! I shall be engaged autotrejningom, gljad and I shall throw out them from a head!

[CHunja]

Yes, possibly advised all young. And I here the mother-in-law! Both me nevestka I like also it or her I like. We also are friends as simply two women - she advises me by way of a young view on a fashion, cosmetics and t much. I to her everyday wisdom throw item. We adore ours malyshku, their daughter, our grand daughter. We consult that to buy or purchase to her by the winter that is necessary. In detail reports on me on its or her successes in a kindergarten. Together we decide as to influence its or her husband (my son) better. Yes it is necessary to live simply! To respect with itself, the relatives. To appreciate that you are not lonely in this world. I always speak " meal to children ". And they to me BOTH mine rebenki. Be not closed in itself, do not wait when to you will meet. Go forward. All will return to you in the future. You dochurka will grow also you become the mother-in-law. And if you at the son-in-law will cause a continuous negative? Represent, HOW to you then it will be bad?! Start to work already now above the well-being in the future. And the mother-in-law not the extraneous person - she mum of your elect, the father of your child. A chain. I wish you goods and happiness.

[Ira]

CHunja has described ideal attitudes or relations, can, such and happen, but more often pochemu-that contentions. I the mother-in-law see time two a year, therefore we and are friends. Gifts I pass through the husband, by phone we stir or chatter hours, we share all gone through; when I laid in hospital, she every day came to feed me. Then again longly did not see. She already old, therefore does not go to the father-in-law on a cemetery, the tomb is looked after by me, she is grateful. The main thing, is less to see. And then, and what for they are necessary to you? The husband wishes to communicate? Let goes with the child, will take a walk, will talk, in you at this time have a rest or make the business or affairs. Well, you are a woman, think up, play, but remember, vam-she the mother-in-law, and to him - mummy liked, it is not necessary to spoil their attitudes or relations, and far away, only polite politeness.