I am pregnant, 31 week. Several days ago has learned or has found out, that my husband misses and...

[ZZZ]

I am pregnant, 31 week. Several days ago has learned or has found out, that my husband misses and grieves about the former girl with whom has left for some months see you me... He spoke me, that all in proshchlom, that all has passed or has taken place. But it has appeared, what is it not so. She has left for other country on the PERMANENT RESIDENCE, and he is torn to her. I saw their correspondence, tears, sobbings... Only it is not necessary to reproach me, that has supposedly got, where does not follow. I in general dollgo could not understand, whose is correspondence (to our computer we have access not only we), yet has not seen the name. Their correspondence proceeded since October, t. e., when he knew, that I wait for the child, called me in marriage and spoke, that likes me, we lived together and had tremendous sex. In the beginning of February I was put with the terrible diagnosis, the tumour of a kidney not compatible to pregnancy, but I have refused treatment and researches and artificial sorts or labors, I do not presume, that my baby was lost, and I have remained is alive, it is better on the contrary.. . But even during this serious time for me I have not found from it or him any support, only a word: " At all of us it will be good, keep and think of the child! " . And at me at that time the soul was torn to parts. Now it seems to me, that I vse-taki shall get out of illness or disease, I so want, I krohi should have healthy and happy mum, and at the husband - the wife. But... Even then he corresponded with her, wrote, that thought, that with me to him " sterpitsja-sljubitsja, but has not left ", that " circumstances drive it or him to her ", that likes the child and it or her, and about me - words. How it to bear or take out??? At serious conversation he has made a decision, that remains with me. But me so it is serious now, sex - 1 2 times a week, he does not care of my satisfaction though my temperament and allows me to be raised and reach or excited and reach;raised and achieve;excited and achieve quickly an orgasm, I understand, that for it or him it becomes or became a matrimonial duty, but not in the desired way of dialogue of two liking people. Though I see, that he tries to give to our life heat and more to something... And today, when to me it became suddenly bad in the bus, he calmed or abirritated me and saying goodbye, has told or said, that likes me. But I cannot neither cope with insult, nor believe in this everything, zs in general to him I do not believe, though I want and very much it or him I like. Can at someone there was such situation? How to leave it or her? Sometimes I would not like to live... (me 24 years, to him - 28, in marriage or spoilage about one year, the reason of marriage or spoilage - probably pregnancy, instead of love)

[Elena]

At me too a similar situation. Only I am not pregnant, simply the husband does not appreciate neither me, nor our attitudes or relations (I recently told about myself in conference). Yes, it is insulting, when you feel (yes know!), That the husband likes another, grieves on her. Also it is visible in all - and does not give attention (as at me), etc. But what to do or make? I for myself have chosen a way - easier or simply to live for today, anywhere far not looking. To me speak, that sooner or later it is possible to leave. But in fact even the greater or big love comes to an end. People meet always and will leave. And how much prodljatsja those or other attitudes or relations, nobody knows. Yes, to you it is serious. Very hardly happens also to me. But it is necessary to live, think of itself, to like and regret itself (to not torment itself with vain ideas, that the husband likes another, he in fact and likes you and will grow fond it is even more if you will believe in it) to think of the future child that he was born healthy to think of the health, as though All of you it was not serious. Children from the god. Think of it or this.

[The anonym]

Vo-the first, calm down. Analyse a situation: back already you will turn nothing, you married, wait for the child is the first. Means, do not twitch! Your husband likes other woman (cannot forget) is the second. Here your main ally - time. The main thing to not hurry, to not force event. Conversations, demands and so forth nothing to achieve. In due course your husband, probably, will forget the former love and will become attached to you and the kid. In common gone through difficulties and pleasures will fasten your marriage or spoilage. Allow him time to one to go through this love. Simply be series, not interfering that he felt, that you - its or his support, its or his family, its or his house, with you it is reliable. Now to you it is insulting and it is sick, you feel lonely and deceived. Very soon all this will seem to you fine and not main because you will have a kid, with it or him you precisely will not feel loneliness. Therefore, vo-the second, concentrate on pregnancy and the illness or disease. To you the main thing now to give birth to the healthy child and to recover. And that will be then - do not think of it or this ahead of time. And in general, the love, passion pass or take place, there is an attachment, tenderness, trust to the person who was with you.

[Light]

It completely agree with the previous author. You should precisely znat-Vy-the wife! He with you, and that was was and remains in the past. My-people, at us are memory and anywhere our memoirs do not disappear, they always with us. For certain and to you is what to recollect. Be the present or true wife and all will develop, as it is necessary. Success and patience. Unfortunately, for happiness and constant love it is necessary to struggle (not fists, but more likely tenderness), they not constant categories, vary in due course, and we should vary and adapt. Be gentle and tender, careful also happiness will be with you.

[Anna]

Has read through on one respiration and already! Heart has missed a bit as though it about me is written. But only I have found out all when was on 35 week and under reports in it or him mobilke and its or his beloved lives in one city with us. And as one and too. Now to the kid already 10 months, as the father onn perfect, as the husband and the man... .voobshchem sex at all did not become. Were at us and scandals. I it or him am not insolent or hold, I speak constantly " if hochesh-leave ". But now he has weighed and has understood, that the family with me and the child is necessary to him, and that was or former - " in one water will not enter " twice. But at me a problem now in drugom-I ALREADY WANT NOTHING. So if he (your husband) is necessary to you, act or arrive according to the Anonym, I with it or him completely agree. Also I give you of 100 %, that you very much will exchange when the kid will be born and all can weigh on a normal head (instead of on the pregnant woman). Also do not take in head (as to be nervous, become hysterical and row now. Muzhiki-it.. . And here rebjatenok now very much requires strong and quiet mum. If you cry, and kroha is pressed and suffers inside. Success to you huge!!! Forces and patience.

[Nika]

Really now it is necessary to calm down, and to wait for occurrence zdorovenkogo karapuza, it now the most important! Let falls in love, you too not on a flusher have found yourselves, give birth, bring up, and there already on obstajatelstvam. Probably he and not too likes was or former, is simple at some men there is such reaction to pregnancy. In any case sosredotochtes on pregnancy and ON ITSELF! Now it is much more important!

[Tanja]

Certainly, it is necessary to be assured or confident in the future, therefore talk to the husband, tell about the thoughts, experiences, about that pain which you wear in yourselves, let he will support or maintain you if with you has decided to build the life. And more. To you already have given many advice or councils, but me the question on your diagnosis, what znachit-does not leave indifferent a tumour of a kidney? Malignant, good-quality? How pregnancy and labors will affect or have an effect yours health, and whether it is possible to give birth or travail? What will be then? You have thought over it, or it is now important to you to give birth only to the child to keep the husband? And, if you will hurt or be ill;be sick longly then, whether there can be he your correct assistant with what happen only present or true devoted husbands? It is a lot of questions, and to you them to solve ONLY TOGETHER! Success, patience and calmness, love with the husband, and he YOUR husband, I wish YOU.

[Irina]

It is necessary to you will calm down and to think only of the kid. Because your mood very much influences the child. And I agree with Anna, that when you give birth, you will come to a correct conclusion, to live to you with the husband and unfortunate, or one with the child, but quiet. You should remember, that YOU SUCH ONE - and is a lot of their (men). So appreciate only itself! I wish your of huge good luck.

[Volodja]

ZZZ, do not pay attention to its or his old love. Well ponastalzhiruet also will forget. HE IN FACT NEAR TO YOU! Whether it is not enough that he there writes to her? Does not think about bad, do not wind itself, think only about good, of your future rebetyonke. Here when give birth will see care of the husband (to one you will not consult unequivocally) and then will understand on its or his care I was right or not about its or his nostalgia. Successful sorts or labors to you!

[borovskaya@mail.ru]

Yana on August, 26th 2004.
Hello. We have lived 3 years, at us the child - 8. For the sake of it or him I have thrown all - job, friends and have left with it or him for other city. Lived well, supported or maintained each other, spoke, that likes. When the daughter even was born has cried with happiness. And here 2 months ago it or he was found by the girl - the first love (was meek or unrequited) the Husband kak-as if have changed.
During our conversations he speaks, that does not know, whether he likes me and whether liked in general. First has told or said that has torn with her, but the new facts of their attitudes or relations were found out. What to do or make? I do not wish to lose the husband, but also to suffer too hardly, how to live with the person who probably does not like. Thus something is afraid (t. e. I wished to miss, and he speaks: give we shall be, we shall look or see). I to him nedoverjaju. Can be to me it is necessary be more resolutely (to leave), can then he will understand something?

[borovskaya@mail.ru]

Yana on August, 26th 2004.
Hello. We have lived 3 years, at us the child - 8. For the sake of it or him I have thrown all - job, friends and have left with it or him for other city. Lived well, supported or maintained each other, spoke, that likes. When the daughter even was born has cried with happiness. And here 2 months ago it or he was found by the girl - the first love (was meek or unrequited) the Husband kak-as if have changed.
During our conversations he speaks, that does not know, whether he likes me and whether liked in general. First has told or said that has torn with her, but the new facts of their attitudes or relations were found out. What to do or make? I do not wish to lose the husband, but also to suffer too hardly, how to live with the person who probably does not like. Thus something is afraid (t. e. I wished to miss, and he speaks: give we shall be, we shall look or see). I to him nedoverjaju. Can be to me it is necessary be more resolutely (to leave), can then he will understand something?