Advise how to live further. With the husband all was perfect the first year two-...

[Tanja]

Advise how to live further. With the husband all was perfect the first year two - planned, dreamed of children, only postponed: he wished to finish at first institute, to find good job, and I had good job, but wished to enable him samoutverditsja, and did not hurry with it or this. And then... kak-that is gradually trite naperekosjak. He has got a job and began to spend there all free time, trying to promote. He became very self-assured, - more likely, any infinite petty quarrels, cavils have begun with its or his party or side to me, children - former not especially wanted. We quarreled, he accused me, that I the bad mistress (about what earlier to him and in a head all did not come), that with children and at all will become complicated, and me was annoyingly, that he does not want, and too postponed - to spite. Without children began to stop up the emptiness with versatile interests, we began to keep away from each other. As a result he has come to conclusion, that we each other do not approach or suit - everyone lives the, and it is better to leave to us. I already left from it or him - to think, but he came with the colors or flowers, guilty, and it would be desirable to forget about the past and to begin all all over again, but the history repeated: through any time euphoria of feelings at it or him passed or took place, he went gloomy, reflected, that we each other do not approach or suit, and what for in that case to get or start children, that we spoil each other a life that can be to me find someone... And I experienced, that time goes, age already critical to get or start the child, was worn on doctors. At us razladilis attitudes or relations: he at job, and I am given to myself, filling a niche everything - career, dialogue with the girlfriends, the second institute, driving to not think... That awfully I want children. Frequent quarrels which he always began - in vain, for the slightest reason. As a result after the next quarrel I have left from it or him - have solved, that for ever though he, having understood, that loses me, did not wish to release or let off, speaking, that to him will be bad without me, but I have made it effort of will: in fact our life has deadlocked or called. But we continued closely, friendly to communicate, he came to me on job, wished me to return again, wished to start - to get or start a new life children and whenever possible to not quarrel. And now... He has unexpectedly learned or has unexpectedly found out, that it or he cannot have children, it is incurable. He in a shock, and I... If with it or him there was all by way of, I would leave it or him rather easy - well there can not be we together, it is impossible! And now I understand, that it is necessary to leave, and I feel myself kak-that disgustingly... The traitress any and svinyoj. How to live with this all further?

[Leka]

At what here children? More precisely what he can have them? He not the cripple which cannot take care of itself. If you do not see with it or him the future (and you from the very beginning had different purposes in a life and values) then leave without meditations. At you only one life to endow itself for the sake of someone, especially if anything together it is impossible. You like it or him? If is not present, remaining together you spoil a life both, and him. In 2 3 his years poedom you will is that " has offered itself for the sake of it or him ". Find to itself normal the beloved, get or start children as well as wanted, and your was or former too can begin all all over again with other woman. In kontse-the extremities or ends on children light a wedge does not converge, and around a heap of women with children who will be happy zaimet the husband and the daddy to the ditju.

[Lora]

Listen, if you have already left, what for to him was to speak you what he cannot have children? I think, that just to cause or call a complex of fault in you. And vy-then at what? If your former numerous attempts in what have not resulted or brought till now, really you think, what now at all of you will be constructed on pity and fault or wine? Vse-taki Russian women - surprising essences! And it is not a pity to you? To live the remained life without children, with the husband who will terrorize you now the " problems and illnesses or diseases " and to blame in occasion of and without? Your victims nobody will estimate or appreciate. All will terminate that you or will get or start the child on the party or side and rasstanetes with the husband, or simply will go mad of not executed reserving of the woman. Calm down, eventually now it is its or his problems. He could be scattered by your feelings and desires why and you once in a life to not make how you want. In fact he just counts on yours " the thin sincere organization " which will understand, will forgive or excuse and td. And in fact it is necessary to be the stinker sometimes.

[Tanja]

Little girls, thanks for answers. Vozvrashchatsja-that I did not think. The main thing, that I wished to find out for myself, it how to get rid of a foolish complex of fault. Basically, your answers have helped or assisted. And he has informed me it just so that I did not exhaust myself by parting (we still have not divorced, we only have parted to think, how to be further - that is I thought here, and he waited) - type all peerly already will not turn out (he knows, that for me it is very important), and at all for the sake of my complex of fault, but it has turned out on the contrary: it would be easier to me to not know. Business not in mine " the thin sincere organization ". The matter is that probably it just the idiotic situation when the love is, and together to live it is impossible: together badly, and separately - is even worse, and it lasts six years with variable success. Me has amazed or struck, has what is it occured or happened just during the moment at the crossroads when wished nakonets-to begin that all anew when he in which that veki itself vseryoz has reflected on children. But, as they say, late to drink borzhomi when kidneys have fallen off.