Has sworn yesterday with mum by phone. To me of 25 years, married three years. Mum ho...

[Tatyana]

Has sworn yesterday with mum by phone. To me of 25 years, married three years. Mum wants grandsons, and we do not hurry up. When she yesterday once again about it or this has told or said, I have not sustained. A pier, that all to me have stuck, well I do not want the child - while. Mum in tears. Speaks, that here I and shall die, grandsons not having waited. To her 60 it was executed in June, and we with my senior brother (to him 36 it is fast) really do not hurry up to get or start children. And I... Well I cannot now about it or this think - is not ready neither morally, nor is material. It turns out, at each of us the reasons. A deposit on soul or douche awful. To mum after yesterday's did not talk yet. What to her to tell or say how to convince? Advise. I in this life can bear or take out all... Also bore or took out. But, when mum cries, at me the silent hysterics begins.

[Valery]

At your mum parent egoism. She should think not only of the whims: " I Want the grandson and all here! ", but also about you. She should not "re-educate" you violently. If she the clever woman will understand and only will be silent to sigh, but to not impose to you the desires, in fact rebyonok-it not a toy! Try to convince it or her that you already adult person and have the right to an own view. Success!

[Bobrov A.E.]

Question on that to have or to not have children very complex or difficult. In many respects he is defined or determined by character of mutual relations with parents. To adjust attitudes or relations with mum I think to you it would be necessary in the beginning to try to understand it or her. Similar, that in general at you not ochen-that turns out to communicate with mum confidentially. (for this purpose the certain boldness is necessary.) Very much often in a basis of desire of mothers to have grandsons lays nerastrachennaja need or requirement for care (about the child, about the daughter), on the one hand, and in attention (from a daughter and its or her husband), on the other hand. For elderly women - to be the grandmother it also the major way of self-realization, the statement of the social and psychological status. I do not exclude also that she simply cares of you. to. After 30 years - to give birth or travail trudnovato, and it is more than complications. Besides children strengthen family. Have it in view of, do not shut eyes to these problems, postrajtes them and to discuss with mum. But only easy, softly, with comprehension of its or her position. And certainly try to understand the attitude or relation to mum: now and in the past.