If I shall die......

[top]

My name is Samson, and me I would be desirable to tell or say that the usual student and I live a usual student's life. I am not praised, but the God has made me beautiful and I am grateful to Him for it. I have been never deprived by attention from a female. But here on April, 27th, 2004, I perspal with the girl and in the morning having woken up, have for some reason recollected AIDS and have decided to hand over analyses, but to me have told or said that it is necessary to wait 3 months and now I wait on July, 27th, and every day for me as a trance, but I would write this letter for that what to tell or say that if analyses will tell or say to me " You is doomed " simply know, that I shall not wait when the mors will come to me and will tell or say " Everything, Samson, is time to go, you the otpljasal " and shall take and shall die so all over the world everyone learn or find out also you who reads this report, too uslyshete. On an extreme measure on news will show.


Because:


.. EXPECTATION OF MORS - IS WORSE THAN THE MORS..

[Schtein]

Listen, be not exhausted, all at you will be good from what you has taken that from you a HIV?? There are suspicions? Look or see at a forum how much people and all class children or guys, fobjat certainly, real + among them it is not enough, but all cheerful and sympathetic, distract make that nibud good, try to look at all with optimism!!!

[tonchik]

Here interestingly suicide is an attribute of force or delicacy? I by the way approximately also thought before the first result. Well and then, what sense in that that I shall die. There is time to make so much all kind that you still has not made.

[garik]

Well also die. What you here about it or this inform? And why you have solved, that it is interesting to us, you or not and as you will die will die. If there is no boldness to live so, that all would learn or find out, what even after a HIV there is a life and happiness die who to you will stir or prevent. But the main thing, certainly, to die loudly. For Native land, for example. By the way, how you will die? Though yes, I have forgotten, that we and so about it or this soon we learn or we find out.


All life - expectation of mors. From this point of view your mum should make abortion, that you would not live pending this mors. And the God in vain gives beauty to muzhiks, is better brains would give.


By the way, what for to wait for 3-month's term, to live pending morses, and then in fact also 6-month's, can is better at once is loud to die, so all would hear and have seen, what you the hero and the clever man. Only here very small, analysis PTSR it is possible to hand over risk in 10 days, whether so it is necessary to die ahead of time?


And in general, here there is a HIV-infected people whom it is not so pleasant from an idea, that their life name expectation of mors, they had enough force and courage to live despite of everything. So if the coward, though another nerves not trepi.


And in general, not noj also be not dishonoured, here many through it have passed or have taken place, the situation and anything were more serious, are alive.


Very small, analysis PTSR beginning or starting from 10 days till 1-2 months it is possible to hand over risk, in 1-2 months PTSR and IFA, in 3-4 months IFA, through 6 IFA. Signs at a HIV are not present. Check up the girl if there is an opportunity.

[Saha]

Soldier Jane - well done!!)))


Especially it was pleasant to me about brains.... Actually but pozdnovato.

[Nata_lee]

Anything, receive minuses, will borrow or occupy in brains.

[Belosnegka]

Jane - that you so today agresivny?

[bolshevo]

Simply I result or bring run in depressnjak in feeling. The only thing about what I did not think, so it of suicide. It is simply a shame to me to look or appear weak and cowardly, I can all and I shall go through all. And you will go through. And that temperature namerjali 37, everything, a coffin reserve...

[Marusenka]

The muzhik should hardly be more beautiful than the monkey))) But terribly clever))))

[Tom]

REX: it approaches or suits To you? If yes, on a hotbed I agree...

[Gulshen]

Good, Jane and of what you thought? Simply interestingly

[Andrey0907]

I here think that I shall make the site where all I shall describe and strazhdushchim to help or assist... And that infy different is a lot of, and here on you on a concrete example chyo yes as. At the same time banery I shall place on youth that at once a head thought instead of a head)))

[Valentinka]

At me he constant was, we got acquainted for serious attitudes or relations, he on prostitutes did not go precisely, not narkomanil. Condoms we predohnjalis, at us were the oral sex not protected only. Simply I did not know, that it or he up to me had one girl who was married, on my suspicions its or her husband could shljatsja on prostitutes, he with her slept not being protected. I have learned or have found out it already after... And he it has not told or said, because about a HIV did not think at all though on this subject we with it or him talked. That's all.


So I thought of everything, other question, that in this world is not present 100 % of protection from what.


We have left it or him. And here if that I would remain one odineshenka, hardly already could get or start family, etc. Also that did not die, and a vein. Here though wives support or maintain you, and he to hand over the analysis has refused. Now here, later the floor of year, has read through all, all has learned or has found out, all has understood, a pardon I asked, yes to me that from this pardon, 5 months in pavor, and now with the minus, and that at it or him and the nobility I do not wish.

[Kosh_ka]

Well you that now in 6 months "-"?


Then my sincere and to die we always shall be in time. In that that we shall make a question before in the life.

[gelo]

5,5 months a minus. And to hand over more shall not go.

[Ragimov]

I shall go I shall look in a mirror)) Like more beautiful monkeys)) Here with mind or wit problemki)) Well good))

[VovaNich]

Suicide an attribute of force or cowardice????


Looking how to look or see, if from unfortunate love from roofs to rush, moreover and not having looked or seen downwards (suddenly somebody on a head) a-attribute of a sick head, yes can also cowardice, the another matter, was a case: the young man, rather beautiful, clever, especially up to the extremity or end of service remains only 4 months. And there was one moment, and he has covered with itself(himself) -1 (for uninitiated, a pomegranate manual) is that?, from one point of view a suicide, he fine realized, that did or made, and on the other hand...???

[julietta2005]

No, I meant when at the person meaningly arm or hand on itself rises. Will power I think should be, though it is clear that he has already surrendered, therefore also the weakling.


And you that were at war?

[Orisha]

Vetal


It is a little

[Sir]

Vetal


And more in occasion of, whether that the weakling the person if he has lifted on itself(himself) an arm or a hand?, we shall try to recollect Japanese, in particular their Samurais, to make above ourselves seppuku (harakiri) was a great honor for which they often asked the sanction at the mister. And only the most worthy gave such right.

[Apos]

Suicide - the most simple way of disposal of a shame and pavor.

[Marina_Cvetkova]

Soldier Jane


And what you will tell or say in occasion of the example resulted or brought by me, there in fact too as a matter of fact suicide, but where a shame and pavor?

[nnnn]

And here other example.


If I learn or find out, that at me +... I am assured or confident, that I have not infected the wife, as was not engaged with her in not protected sex after the infection.


Then suicide - not cowardice, and sober calculation. Native do not learn or find out, why I so have acted or arrived. Or I shall think up any other reason and I shall write it or her in a note.


Certainly, for all there will be a shock. But they will go through it. Time will cure all.


And to live with it or this... For native excruciatings. All the same around all becomes known. And then all the same mors. And after that from my wife everyone will jump aside. Because a vein with infected...


Can suicide is better? In this case it will not be flight and cowardice, and will be care of relatives.


To split the site with one blow instead of it is a lot of years to untangle it or him and all the same to not untangle...............

[kombi]

Mine IMHO on a question of a suicide:


If to consider or count sufferers (svjatoterptsev, sacred) perenesivshih horrifying flours or torments as (+) the suicide will be on an opposite pole of acts (-). It is logical, that they - antisacred.





Personally I too could suddenly zakipishit, start think constantly " and suddenly at me (+) " months and years to take myself for a ride, to strain or torment nerves, instead of living, but me for some reason on such actions does not pull, and not in that that I am afraid learn or find out business that at me can to be (+) or (-). The matter is that I do not give to it or this value or meaning;importance. IMHO if this AIDS also is, he is not necessary that because of it or him to exhaust the rests of a life, and to go bad. And from incurable diseases people recovered, and IMHO has put in so-called Will to live.





Still is such povere, that ideas are material. If the sportsman- on a regular basis during a landing will think that here now I and I shall break to itself something... And sooner or later will break. Only he incorrect will make conclusions from this. Will think that correctly did or made that doubted, that at it or him any gift or for nothing of a prediction is, and actually he has provoked it, subconsciously itself(himself) having programmed, priminiv technics or technical equipment "anti-". The some people will regard it as priduroshnost, or other mental deviation or rejection, and the some people will judge that simply the person needs to fill the certain quantity or amount shishek before this luggage will be overflown, and he at last will brighten up or clarify, and will understand, that itself this all provoked. Not in this life, and much later. On that he and experience to comprehend itself.





Sorri for possible or probable cherezchur filosofichnye notki.

[Tanja Item]

Lisss:


At you an example unsuccessful. It not suicide, is a feat, because for the sake of others. It even it is impossible to name suicide. And the set example does not approach or suit to a subject here discussed. If their life is not necessary to boys, let will participate in any program on test of vaccines or medicines for treatment of a HIV, for others the advantage or benefit will be also the life knowingly will live. In your example in this act there was a sense, and suicide owing to a HIV senselessly even because to anybody from it or this the advantage or benefit will not be. Parents will suffer, the wife and children ostanutsja one in this world to be interrupted.


I too can result or bring an example. At us neighbours on a garden. The husband could not find job and was hung up. The wife has remained one with two children. Without money and education. Slaves in two kitchen gardens (in ours to a garden 8 sotok vypahivaet), works at 2 jobs, daughters are dressed, fed, uchatsja, to her help or assist. So who from them is strong, and who is weak? And whether it is possible to name this act of the husband strong?


Egor:


You the father? What would you feel, having lost the child? Why you do not think what about parents, the wife and children should someone care? Why this someone - everybody, but not you? Why everyone learn or find out, what you are infected? And if tomorrow parents will be ill also with it or him there will be nobody glass of water to submit? And if (God forbid) what to happen with the wife with whom there will be a child? You argue as egoists, think only of yourself. Suicide in this case - attempt to decline all responsibility that has made to destroy a life of other people. Your wife and so have the right will solve, live with you or not. The child will require all the same the father, parents in the son. If you could not justify their hopes in one, will justify in other, you are simply obliged to make it because they rastili you and believed in you, and you have acted or arrived carelessly and recklessly.





Your life does not belong to you. She belongs to God and people who live near to you. It is a pity what even now you of it or this and have not understood.


Also it is not necessary examples with granatoj. A pomegranate is one, and here to put a member without elastic anywhere is another. Too to me, analogy have spent. When he on a pomegranate fell, he, probably, rescueed or saved;salvaged people. And you whom except for yourselves rescueed or saved;salvaged during that moment when with the girl laid? Only relatives substituted under impact.